Captain Alcohol

Noah AKA Captain Alcohol is a local super hero who fights for justice and cold ones. His presence has a blessing and a curse, he has the unique super powers of urinating in bottlesand producing School Safety Instructional videos.His only weakness is the song Low Rider by War.Upon hearing this song, Captain Alcohol will instantly shift back to his alter-ego Noah and be lulled into a deep sleep. This act is called Lopezing and it is the only way to stop Captain Alcohol after a day of terrorizing locals helping local communities and building homes with Habitat for Humanity.

To this day the location of Captain Alcohol is unknown, he was last seen burning down a church rescuing a small child from a manhole near a local Poutine Shack.